Q: I have been living with herpes for the past decade. Now, whenever I tell a woman about it before sex, I am rejected. Is there any safe site to find girls with herpes? By the way, I don’t like using condoms.
A: Yes, if you go online you will find many websites that brings herpes singles together. Just Google “herpes dating sites” or “herpes communities.” However, many people who have herpes would not think about going to the online dating site, and I am surprised you haven’t run across partners already who have it — 16 percent of Americans have HSV-2 infections.
But I think there is more going on here when you say you don’t like condoms. I wonder if you’ve suggested unsafe sex to women who didn’t think they had herpes? Of course they wouldn’t want to do that — and neither should you. First of all, there are other type of STD besides herpes, including HIV, HPV, syphilis etc. You may get if you don’t use protection. Also, even if you have herpes, someone else who has it might cause a flare-up — which isn’t pleasant at all.
It is easy to get comfortable using condoms, and that will increase your chances of finding women who will feel safe having sex with you.
Sure, you can find online communities with other singles with herpes, and I think this would be a good idea. But I also think you should always wear a condom. You can have pleasure, and also not worry about being infected with — or giving new STDs.